My $100 haircut – at sea (a few boat pictures –tomorrow, Aqaba, Jordan)

I know people who routinely get $100 haircuts, but usually I am not one of them. I think my salon calls itself something like “Curl up and Dye” – well, maybe that isn’t it, but you get the idea. I usually have a coupon if that helps paint the picture any better. After almost four months without so much as a trim, I had that sheepdog look. It must be time to bite the bullet and get “shaped up”. Settling in the hair chair, the “coiffure technician” scrutinized my locks with great concern. Frowning she opined that much help was needed. An inch of “lifeless” ends must be removed before even attempting anything else. Fine. About five minutes later after chopping off over 3 inches in the back, she saw the alarmed look in my eyes. She confidently assured me, “Your hair needed more “trimming” than I originally thought. Don’t worry it will look fine when I am done”. Finally laying down her scissors, out came a straightening iron – then she was finished. She turned me around to the mirror – ta-dah. It was short, slick and so flat to my head it looked as if the hair had been painted on. The finishing touch was some blunt cut bangs falling annoyingly into one eye. I am thinking for a hundred bucks, I should look better than this when departing the ship’s “Elite Spa”… but, maybe it was just me. My first hint that it might not be just me was when I met a lady coming down the stairs from the spa. She looked a little pained and said, “Oh my, you got your hair cut.” Now I don’t know about you, but to me that doesn’t sound like a positive reaction to my new $100 “do”. I knew I was in real trouble when I got Jim’s response to the costly coiffure. He is one of those people who believe if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all. (Remember he lived with 6 women under his roof most of his life. I am sure he learned that philosophy the hard way.) Anyway, when I returned to the cabin, Jim looked at me and after a minute or so, knowing he had to say something, ventured, “Um …. It really looks different from how you usually wear it. Pause … Ah … Do you like it?” Hey, pretty good, an artful sidestep if ever I heard one. But then he continued, “That’s alright, you would look beautiful even bald.” Oops – see now he went one step too far. While to a man that might sound like a compliment, what a women hears is, “Don’t worry – I agree it’s dreadful, just one step short of bald, but you can overcome this disaster.” Oh well, hope springs eternal - I always go into a hair salon hoping one day I will get the perfect haircut. I guess this wasn’t the day.